TekWatch: Profiling Tek, Working Class Hero

It didn’t take long this postseason for the Tek Kool-Aid to look good and sugary. Let’s get to it.

Heart of the Order: Jason Varitek

Careful readers always check MLB.com’s ample footnotes; the one here clarifies that “heart of the order” means below the heart of the order, near the tubes that discharge excrement like Julio Lugo.

When you mention the word "leader" in baseball circles, the image of Jason Varitek probably comes to mind first in the minds of many.

If you mean the many who think first of the bottom of the leader list, then float up to the middle, and back down, then yes, Jason Varitek pops to fucking mind.

Since [Varitek became starting catcher in 1999], the Red Sox are 14-3 in potential elimination games, and it isn't a reach to point to Varitek's leadership and refusal to panic as a reason for that impressive mark.

It isn’t a reach if you’re listing every possible factor. Then again, it isn’t a reach to think that the Sox might be 15-2, 16-1, or 17-0 if they had a catcher who could hit the ball really well.

High school and college students probably don't use as many loose-leaf binders as Varitek, who is a picture in preparation. Varitek doesn't just study scouting reports -- he breaks them down and dissects them.

This is the most compelling evidence I’ve seen. Let’s see if there’s any evidence that this preparation makes a significant difference in Red Sox pitching performances.

When Josh Beckett arrived at Spring Training this season, coming off a disappointing 2006, he was asked if there was a lesson he learned that he could convey to the newcomer of this year, Daisuke Mastuzaka. "If I could tell Matsuzaka anything, it would be, 'Trust 'Tek’”….All that trust later, Beckett had a dominant regular season, winning 20 games, and his brilliant postseason work has fueled the Red Sox to the World Series. It further exemplifies the type of things that can happen when pitchers put their faith in their so-called "guide."

After all those binders, Varitek realized in 2007 that Josh Beckett should once in a while throw one of those shit-kicking curveballs he, you know, has in his arsenal of pitches. Tek’s a little slow, but so methodical. Or maybe Beckett did not throw any curves in 2006 because of blisters on his hand! Which factor could matter more?

Excuse me. I’m having a sargasm. I just can’t get over the dominance of Jason Varitek, Working Class Hero. When you work hard and don’t shave, nothing can stand in your way. Someday you, too, boys and girls, by the grace of the mediocrity God gave you, can get credit for things that are mostly the doing of others.

Along with wife Karen, Varitek has become a fixture in community endeavors. This season, he hosted the second annual Jason Varitek Celebrity Putt-Putt Tournament, with proceeds going to Boston Children's Hospital.

If it’s the Jason Varitek Celebrity Putt-Putt Tournament, who are the celebrities? The guy who used to buff the floor of the Boston Garden before Celtics games?

Seriously, Tek's smart. It’s hard to swing and miss in putt-putt.

For the last four years, Varitek has run a "Tek's 33" program, in which kids from Children's Hospital come to Fenway Park and meet Varitek, while enjoying batting practice and watching a game.

Our Working Class Hero is also a Pretty Nice Guy. I just hope the kids get to see Manny Ramirez so they don’t leave disappointed.