Red Sox Statement on Schilling

From MLB.com, with liberties:

"Curt Schilling was examined by Red Sox doctors in January after he reported feeling right shoulder discomfort. Curt has started a program of rest, rehabilitation and shoulder strengthening in an attempt to return to pitching. He's a huge fucking stubborn fat asshole who won't get surgery and void his contract, so come season's end we will pay him $8 million shit-covered dollars. If you have prior experience dipping dollars in shit, please contact the Boston Red Sox."

This Just, Deliciously, In

Curt Schilling has added bylines to each entry on his blog. Yes, his blog, the one that reads "Curt Schilling’s Official Blog" at the top because only Curt Schilling posts on it. It also has a photo of Schilling pitching, with Schilling's signature. Also, it is named "38 Pitches;" Schilling wears number 38 and is a pitcher.

Maybe I'm being unfair. When a recent post ended its title with just one exclamation point rather than five--without changing fonts in the middle of a single sentence--I did for a moment doubt the identity of the author.