*In an imagined world where Manny Ramirez was healthy and playing rather than benched, stoned and dreaming of ponies and cake.
In Friday's game, an amazing Yankees comeback was spoiled by an even more amazing Red Sox walk-off win. Manny Ramirez smacked a three-run home run clear over the Green Monster as the Sox took game one, 10-8. J.D. Drew left the game with a concussion.
Saturday was a Red Sox romp, as the Sox roughed up Chien-Ming Wang and the Yankees' bullpen for 15 runs, five driven in by Sox slugger Manny Ramirez. J.D. Drew left the game with tenderness in his brain.
Sunday saw another Manny-powered win. The game was tied 1-1 until the bottom of the fifth inning, when Manny Ramirez smacked a bases-loaded, bases-clearing triple to right-center field. Later Ramirez made a sensational defensive play, scaling the Green Monster to rob Derek Jeter of a three-run homer. The Red Sox won 5-1. J.D. Drew left the game with encephalitis, leading doctors to find a career-ending series of tumors.
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4 comments:
I'm guessing Manny also discovered a loophole in Drew's contract so the Sox aren't on the hook for $70 million to a brain-dead zombie?
I'm getting word that Manny also convinced A-Rod to come to Boston.
Yeah, I'm sure Manny can hook him up with the hottest strippers he will ever meet.
Indeed, there's a good chance that illegitimate sons of A-Rod are growing up in Boston right now as A-rod-hating Sox fans. And a very good chance that illegitimate sons of Manny are growing up in the Bronx as Manny-hating Yanks fans.
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